Life Is A Book

As I wrote earlier, about the song being the summary of a chapter in my life's story, I feel that some chapters that we thought are ours and ours only, may be someone else's too. So, when you go through the chapters of your life story, take a minute to ask yourself, if some chapters appear in someone's book of life. It's amazing to see how things just fall into place, with the character easily assuming his or her role without knowing how it will all end.
And some parts of the book just stick with you and you sometimes wish you can replay those moments over and over again. And some parts are just forgettable and some, unfortunately, are so painful to read, what more go through. But, I suppose, that's what makes a book worth reading- one that can evoke pain, create love, make you laugh and one that brings you to tears. And contrary to what people say, I don't think we are the authors of our book of life. There's an omnipotent one, otherwise, how is it possible that some chapters that we truly think is our own making appears in some one else's? We are just the actors who can have a certain say as to how we want to act upon certain scenes. Like, if it was written that I were to meet him and love him and yet not being able to be together, then it had to be that way. I had to meet him. But , the words that were exchanged, the places that were to contain the scences, were all decided by the actors, by me. And how I choose to react to the painful moments, that had to come, depends on the state of mind I am in. Make sense? Will my book end beautifully? Or will it contain many life's complications and lessons? Or will it have an abrupt ending?
Only the Author knows.

The Heart's Content

Demi Waktu- Ungu

aku yang tak pernah bisa lupakan dirinya
yang kini hadir diantara kita
namun ku juga takkan bisa menepis bayangmu
yang slama ini temani hidupku

maafkan aku menduakan cintamu
berat rasa hatiku tinggalkan dirinya
dan demi waktu yang bergulir disampingmu
maafkanlah diriku sepenuh hatimu
seandainya bila kubisa memilih

kalau saja waktu itu ku tak jumpa dirinya
mungkin semua takkan seperti ini
dirimu dan dirinya kini ada dihatiku
membawa aku dalam kehancuran

When I heard this song, I thought it was so fitting.
Like a summary of a chapter of my life's story.
Maybe his too.

Growing Up

I was clearing my emails and these photos appeared.

The pictures of the boys I used to teach.

And scolded.

This is Tzen and his dad.

I am sorry Tzen for not asking for your permission to publish this photo.

But, look, he has become a handsome young man.

Not the kid that I used to bug at!

P6-5, 2005

These are Jeremy and Christopher.
I am sorry guys, for not asking your permission to publish this picture.

These brothers, I used to teach.

Nice little kids who have grown into such

fine gentlemen.

P6-1, 2003

Life Is Precious, Time Is Short

The other day, it dawned on me that my kids have grown so much, leaving the years of growing up behind. And there I was, missing all those beautiful moments because I was so engrossed with work, something that does not mean anything to me. How could I be so careless missing out on the things that really matter to me? Like my family, friends and people that I care so much for.
Today, I finally got in touch with one of my old boys, on MSN. It just seemed a second ago that I nagged at him and his classmates on the importance of PSLE and this year, he will be sitting for his O levels! Was I on express train to reach a destination that I am not even sure of? That the train went so fast I didn't even experience the beautiful scenery that lined the track?
Looking back, I realise that it's not the destination that I am seeking, it's the journey. It's a sad reality that I have not made a single journey but I have been to many destinations.
Maybe, it is time for me to slow down and enjoy the scenery, the journey, because at the end of the day, the end will always come. And I want to keep the journey alive even when I have reached the final point.